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miss you, miss you August 30, 2010

Posted by altari in mi familia, words.
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Words I’d like to casually say to my Dad,

Pa, did you know? Your granddaughter loves to break-dance now. She also loves Disney princesses, her favorite is Ariel. She thinks Mr. Bean is the most gorgeous guy in the world. Oh, and she bites when she’s too excited. Yep, the terrible two moment…

…if only I could.

Oh, by the way Pa, she still remembers you, thank God. Yes, she misses you… a lot

…me too, Papa.


you’re stepping on my heaven*, mother :) January 18, 2010

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I could have just kissed your foot… but Mother,

…. I know it would just break your already broken heart to mere dust.

But feel this. Yes… it’s my hand, holding yours.

We’re in this together….

We are

(*) as a moslem, I’ve been taught to believe that heaven is within reach if you grandly honor your mother. Heaven being under a mother’s feet is a figure of speech to describe it.

who should know that… June 6, 2009

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I’m sorry if I have a dignity.

I’m sorry if I want my share of happiness too.

I’m sorry if I don’t want to sacrifice myself anymore.

I’m sorry if I feel right.

I’m sorry if I object being hurt.

I’m sorry if I want to hear just that one word ‘sorry.’

I’m sorry if I scare you.

despite the urge to PUNCH. March 25, 2009

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One day, when it’s like any other day…

you may bump into someone who just has to ruin your day. Your happiness is definitely not on his/her list, nor is his/her concern. What he/she does to you, may instantly make him/her on top of your hit list. Hit, as in ‘punch’, ‘blow’ or ‘strike’, definitely not ‘murder’ please.

What he/she says to you, may inevitably make the gravitation of the Moon show an evident effect on your blood, making it jolting up to your head and boiling. You imagine how it would feel relieving to fold his/her body into two, like folding a sheet of paper, if only you could. But then again, all you can do is keeping the grudge underneath. Oh how you’d like to do the same to the person in return, but it’ll just make you become indifference with him/her, won’t it?

He/She leaves… but your day stays there. Your rage is still trapped underneath, yet, your day has to go on. So outraged, you tremble.

  1. So, quick! Grab any of your favorite non-alcoholic drink, e.g. hot chocolate, iced orange, hot chamomile tea, et cetera. Drink it slowly. Savor every flavor. Don’t picture anything in your head. It’s between you, and the drink. It’s personal.
  2. Listen to your all-time favorite song. If you happen to be in your room, the good news is you can sing along and dance to it! Oopss… don’t forget to close the door. Someone watching you with jaw dropping (or worse, holding giggles) may be the last thing you wanna see.
  3. You keep your baby’s pictures in your mobile phone or computer? Go, go, go! Open the folders and start looking at them all over again, from the very first minute of your baby’s arrival.
  4. Bear this in mind: there’s always someone else in the world who has a worse day than you. It can be your neighbor, or it can be Angelina Jolie. Don’t get it wrong, this doesn’t mean you should feel glad about it. You just simply need to know that you’re not alone.
  5. Try to find a person who seems to need your help. Give advices, offer to carry your friend’s stuffs… you’ll find out that no matter how small the help you give, in a way it always gives us a good feeling. Sometimes one good feeling is enough to overcome the bad one.
  6. For my moslem fellows, I’m sure dzikr is the answer for the terrible moment.

“advice, anyone?” follow up February 20, 2009

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Some of you may remember that I once had a situation with someone.

Regarding my situation, well… I’m not sure whether it can now be categorized as better or not. What happens these days is, I only talk to this ‘person’ whenever necessary. Meaning, she (yup, it’s a she) talks to me first, and then I reply, and… that’s it, pretty much.

Sometimes I blame the old me for having a high expectation on her. I mean, in the past I wanted her to be kind to me and treated me the way she treated others. But the thing with ‘high expectation’ on people is… most of them just let you down in the end. Yes, I’m very much aware that nobody’s perfect (ugh, I actually don’t fancy clichés but they always embody a condition precisely. To me, clichés can be annoying yet effective at the same time.) Still, not that I expected a perfection in her treatment to me, just please be nice.

Anyhow, now my burden is very much lifted compared to the last time. I thank and appreciate friends who spare their time to share their views through this blog and e-mail.

This person and I don’t communicate much with each other anymore, which is a good thing, because that way I can keep my mind clear from negative thoughts about and the irritated feelings from her. I see her more like a mere passerby, so I don’t feel obliged anymore to care that much about her, which is again a good thing.

You know what guys, somehow I read a signal from her that she actually was aware about my change of attitude towards her recently. I found that sometimes she tried to have a longer conversation with me and she made the attempt obvious. But then again, I remained the passive side. And I don’t see what’s wrong with that as long as I stay polite. I still need more time to be normal with her.

So, even though at the beginning of this post I sounded uncertain about my situation being better or not, now I’m finally able to conclude that yes, in relation to my feelings, it’s much better =)


B.F.F. February 18, 2009

Posted by altari in the circle, words.
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My fact number one: I’m not young anymore.

My fact number two: (No intention to brag…) One of my talents since I was a kid is easily make friends with people I newly meet.

My fact number three: I’m not sure what the relation between fact number one and two is, but I insist on keeping fact number one above (hee hee…)

My fact number four: I have lotsa of them, everywhere across our beautiful globe.

My fact number five: I’m not good at keeping in touch, but they’re not leaving me yet (or it could be my wishful thinking, hihihih…)

My fact number six: I don’t make best friends easily.

Yeah, kinda sad. And sometimes I can feel awful too. There were times when I found out that some people just put me on their speed-dial lists, while they’re not on mine. They usually press their cell phones on my salary day. Naah… just kidding (while looking cautiously at some dudes.)

Okay, here goes fact number seven: My best friends are less than ten people.

So, what does it take to become someone’s best friend?

Do you even remember the very first meeting with your long-time best friend?

How did you feel about him/her at that time?

Actually, some of my best friends were the people I hated at first. They might have given me the worst impressions ever. But people do change (surprisingly, when you least expect them to.) They changed, I changed, and suddenly we all meet at the same level of comfort without even remembering how we used to be so different before.

Now let me remember how my best friends and I got to that level…

Ah yes, compromising. Must be that. Compromise is a point where a person puts his/her being selfish aside for certain conditions. He/she doesn’t have to accept the condition, just not against it. No, the previous sentence is not a definition. It’s simply a conclusion I learn by not-always-but-at-least-giving-it-a-try doing it.

I find that compromising involves respect and appreciation. So, if it feels good when someone pays you a respect and appreciates you, why don’t you do the same to others?

Anyways, the title ‘best friend’ is not a bonus. To me, it’s an achievement through loyalty, trustworthy and sincerity.

So, don’t listen to your friend’s personal story just because you’re curious, but because you do care. And if you say “I’ll always be there for you”, sometimes it doesn’t have to mean you’re physically there or always provide time for your best friends. Just make them feel that they’re not alone, especially when they’re pouring their personal stories to you. Don’t respond a sad story with “Oh, that kind of thing never happens to me!” otherwise they’ll thank you for making them feel lonelier. Sometimes a little “uh-huh” or a small nod works.

However, if your sad friend demands you to listen to him/her all the time, while you’ve actually got something else not less important to do, yet he/she just doesn’t wanna understand that, then perhaps he/she is not the one.

to the (not) early birds, some tips… December 17, 2008

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When you get to your office late, here are some tips for you:

1. If you bring a bag, know someone right outside your office.

For example, the owner of a food stall where you regularly eat at or the person who gives you parking ticket. Ask him/her to guard your bag for a while. Once again, make sure both of you know each other, meaning you’ve chatted with him/her often before.

I knew the guy who sat in the parking ticket booth pretty well. So when I got to my office late, I asked him to guard my laptop bag while I went inside the building. And then I picked it up at lunch break when the office was empty so that nobody could see me sneaking up holding a large bag, without forgetting to bring him a bottle of iced tea.

At another time, I asked a friend from a different floor to guard it. This time it costed me a lunch box. But hey, lunch box compared to the office-owned laptop?

Alternatively, phone a friend (hang on, the last three words sound familiar…) who parks his/her car in the building. Put the bag in the car until lunch break. Words of caution: make sure no one else see you put it in the car. Some bad guys do target on cars with ‘obvious’ expensive stuff in them.

2. Stop by at the canteen to take away a cup of coffee or just a snack.

3. Walk into your office coolly and make sure everybody can see the coffee or the snack.

Why? The action will hopefully imply that people didn’t see you before because you went out to buy small breakfast. But if you have a meeting to attend, tell them you were locked in the toilet.

Good luck!

here, now. December 17, 2008

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Okay, so I’m running away from bunnymeetz.wordpress.com

I simply want to start anew. Nothing wrong with my old pages. It’s just that… (here we go…)

One, I haven’t posted there since, whoa… a year! Well, okay, almost. But still, everyone who takes a look at the last post in my old blog will surely think that it’s been abandoned. That the author just doesn’t care about it anymore (this was half true.) Alrighty then, my old blog was abandoned. I can take that. I must admit that I’m not much of a regular and high-spirited blogger. I made new posts when I felt like it. Oh well, you’ll probably still see me that way here.

Two, I was desperate with a new blog address. Bunnymeetz?? Come ooonn…! I chose bunny and meet (not a typo. It’s ‘meet’, really) coz I was, and probably still am, crazy about rabbits and I wanted to copy the words “Meet the Press” as in NBC TV Station in relation with WordPress. So, I guess some bunny had been pretty lucky to meet the press for a while.

Three, things happened for the past eleven months and they changed me. I’m brand new (except the ‘not much of a regular and high-spirited blogger’ part, d’uh…)

So is my blog.